Okay, so the new People Magazine is out on store shelves… The one promoting "The Sexiest Men in America." I'd just like to point out that they list 25 guys in that issue, and they failed to mention me.

Again.

How can this sort of thing happen, you ask? Beats me. A clerical error, perhaps. Or a vast, right wing conspiracy. However, my sources tell me this, like everything else in this country, is the work of George W. Bush.

All right — I just had to get that off my chest before my lawyer contacts them. Now let me get to some of the more general queries people have sent my way recently…

Ashley wrote to ask, "How many queries do you get each day, and how many of those do you accept? How many times in a month do you ask to see the full manuscript?"

In 2008, I've received an average of about 175 queried proposals per month. Of those, I'll ask maybe 10 to send me the full manuscript. Of those, I might choose to represent one or two.

Gwen asked, "As an agent, do you value the full person and relationship as much as the person's writing? For example, if you agreed to represent an author, and they didn't make you any money, would you remain friends with that person? Would you keep them as a client and encourage them in ways to be successful?"

There's no way to answer that question without sounding self-aggrandizing, so get ready… Yes, I value the person as much as the person's writing. Most of the authors I represent become personal friends, and we work together for a long time. I try to represent people for the long haul — not just for the current book. And we're creating books together, not just locating money sources. In many ways, a good agent is a business partner with an author, offering writing advice and friendship and perspective and maybe even some life coaching, not just contract negotiations and manuscript sales.

People often ask what an agent is looking for, and that's an easy one to answer: a great idea, expressed through great writing, by an author with a great platform. But I'll admit I don't end up representing every good idea I see. I really have to feel comfortable with the writer, to LIKE the person, or I'm probably not going to represent them. Life is too short to work with jerks (which is probably why I've been turned down by some authors). I also want to fall in love with the person's writing. If the author is someone I like personally, and someone I know is talented at writing, I'll go a long way with them. Right now you could survey the authors I represent, and you'd find some of them are people who haven't made me much money (or, in a few cases, any money). But that's just the publishing business — and frankly, we're going to see much more of that in the near future, as the economy forces publishers to become even more picky. So, yes, I generally keep the relationship going with clients if we're friends and I believe in their work. And certainly we talk about ways they can be successful — that's the agent's job.

And Mel wants to know, "Is there ever a time where you decide to move on and terminate the agent/author relationship?"

Sure, that happens. I'm not trying to imply in my answer above that an agent won't sometimes stop representing an author. That happens — and it's usually due to one of two things: Either the relationship has been damaged in some way, or the agent has just come to the conclusion that he or she can't do anything to help the author. Sometimes an author will decide they need to moe on. Maybe the relationships gets damaged (though my experience is usually that's due to a communication gap). If I reach a place where I feel I've tried everything, we've worked through several projects, and nothing has sold, then I might say to the author, "You know, this doesn't seem to be working. Perhaps you should begin the process of finding another agent who can take you in different directions. I can't seem to help you move forward." Nobody really wants to stay in a business relationship that's failing.

Tim wrote to ask, "As an author, is it worth the $240 per year for me to subscribe to Publisher's Weekly?"

In my world it is. I'm not sure it's a great expenditure for you as an author, Tim, but it's the best way I know of to stay on top of the industry. I love PW — it helps me know what's going on, educates me about various markets, gives me examples of books and titles and covers to show me what the trends are, and offers me dozens of quality book reviews. Still the best source for understanding the industry, in my view. BUT, if you're an author who isn't feeling all that much of a need to connect to the industry, then you might find the price a bit steep.

I've had several questions lately about how authors get paid…

Deonne wrote and asked, "Can you explain what an advance is, and how it is paid?"

Happy to. When an author signs a book deal with a publisher, he or she is usually paid an advance against royalties. Think of that advance as getting a loan against your future earnings. If the publisher has, for example, agreed to pay you a $25,000 advance, it means you're in the red that amount. As each copy of your book sells, your account is credited the amount you've earned. At some point, you sell enough copies that your book has "earned out" its advance. (So if you were paid $25,000 and you're earning $1 in royalty on each book, you'll earn out your advance when your book has sold 25,000 copies. Clear?) From that point on, you're making new money on each book. Your publisher will settle with you either quarterly or semi-annually, sending you a check for the money owed due to book sales.

Most advances are paid either in halves (half upon signing, half upon delivery of the manuscript) or in thirds (one-third upon signing, one-third upon delivery, one-third upon publication). Lately, publishers have been pushing authors to accept being paid in thirds, since it spreads out the payments a bit.

Dreema asked, "If my book doesn't earn out the advance, do I have to pay back the unearned advance?"

This is a common question, and the answer is "not normally." An advance is a shared risk — the publisher is risking that the author is going to write a good book, deliver it on time, and it's going to catch on with readers. The author is risking that he or she is going to take months out of life in order to create the book, then hand it over to a publisher who will do a good job of selling it. So assuming you turn in the manuscript and the publisher produces it and puts it onto store shelves, if the book does not earn out, the author is not required to pay back the unearned portion.

That said, there's one exception to this rule… With a handful of houses, the publisher may try to hold the rights hostage. That is, if your book goes out of print, those publishers will ask that you pay back the outstanding advance before reverting rights back to you. Thomas Nelson is perhaps the most visible publisher who practices this in CBA. I love the team at Thomas Nelson, and I think they're a very well-run company, but this is a practice that drives agents and authors crazy… As noted before on this blog, an author should not equate "unearned advance" with "losing money." A book may not earn out its advance, but that does not mean the publisher lost money on the deal. I've gone over those numbers on this blog in the past.

Cheryl wants to know, "What is an average advance and royalty for a new author?"

This isn't a a state secret, as some have pretended… it's just not an easy number to pin down. For a large publisher, an advance can range from a few thousand dollars to as much as $25,000 for a new author. It could be even greater if the author has a large platform, or a very unique idea, or there is a lot of organizational enthusiasm for the project. The number isn't pulled out of thin air; it's based on the number of copies the publisher thinks he can sell. For a smaller publisher, an advance could range from a few hundred dollars to a couple thousand dollars. Some small publishers are not able to pay an advance.

Royalty rates for most general market publishers are fairly standard. Hardcovers pay 10% of the retail price of the book for the first 5000 copies sold, 12.5% for the next 5000 copies, and 15% thereafter. Trade paper books will pay a flat 7.5% of the retail price, and mass market books will pay around 6%. So if you're working with a general market publisher and doing a $12.95 trade paperback, your earnings will be about a dollar per book ($12.95 x 7.5% = 97 cents).

There are two differences when dealing with CBA publishers. First, they pay based on the net price of the book, not the retail price. The net price is usually defined as "whatever the publisher receives for the book, " so the author's payment will vary based on the deals the salesmen make with bookstores and other retailers. Second, they don't have a fixed percentage that everyone pays, so CBA houses will negotiate their royalty rates. Think of the low end of a trade book as 12-to-14%, and the high-end royalty as 22-24% for best-selling authors. It's a huge range, so it's fairly obvious that having a good negotiator sitting down to represent you can come in handy (trust me: the publishers have teams of experienced accountants and lawyers on their side, so it's not a bad idea to have someone who knows what they're doing looking after your interests).

Thomas wrote this: "I have an organization that can sell a lot of books. What is the standard buy-back rate for an author to purchase his or her own book? And is that rate negotiable?"

In my experience, just about everything in a publishing contract is negotiable (except maybe the name and address of the publisher). The standard buy-back rate for most publishers is about 50% (that is, the author can purchase copies of the book for 50% off the retail price). Some houses start with a 40% discount and negotiate upwards. And many are willing to give significant buy-back discounts to authors who can move a lot of copies. Again, this is easy money for a publisher — the author is guaranteeing to buy books, they are generally not returnable, and the publisher makes a profit on these copies without investing a lot of sales or marketing time. So yes, this is certainly negotiable.

One important thing to understand about author buy-backs concerns the printing side of the publishing biz. Adding on extra copies at the end of a scheduled print run will significantly lower your costs. Think of it this way: if the publisher is intending to print 5000 copies of your book, and you order an additional 1000 copies, all they have to do is "leave the machine on a while longer." In other words, they simply ask the printer to run an extra thousand. The publisher doesn't have to invest warehouse time, or deplete their stock — and, in fact, that extra thousand copies actually lowers the printing cost of all the books, so the publisher is making even more money on those copies. So it's sometimes possible for your agent to negotiate a great buy-back rate if you agree to purchase a large quantity at the end of a print run.

If you've got a question about writing and publishing, let me know and I'll try to make up an answer…

A while back, a website manager said she wanted to ask me some questions, in order to find out more about my role and my life. Most of the time I'm answering questions about the industry on this blog, so here's a post that's a bit different… I'm answering questions from Ashley Weis, who runs a very funny and creative blog.

1. As an agent, what is a typical Monday like for you?

I get up early, go running, drink a huge mug of Starbucks (which I now make myself, since I can't see paying $4 a pop each morning), then face mycomputer. It seems like Mondays are the days I need to catch up on emails and phone calls… um,this doesn't sound very exciting, does it? I've been teaching a couple writing classes for a university, but that's coming to an end in a couple weeks, and I've decided I'm done with teaching for a while. I'd love to tell you that I generally do a million dollar deal on Mondays, or that Monday is the day I solve world hunger or pray until I glow in the dark, but it's not. Mondays are my day for catching up on stuff, so it's pretty much a day filled with talking — via the phone or the internet. Patti usually has Mondays off (she works for Barnes & Noble), so she quilts and reads and occasionally interrupts me. We have dinner together, she goes to her Bible study, and I watch Monday Night Football. Clearly you were hoping for something more when you asked the question. (TUESDAYS! It's on Tuesdays I routinely do those million dollar deals and promote world peace. Trust me on this.)

2. What is the best book you ever read?

Ack. Asking a book guy for one favorite book is always a Herculean task. When I was a kid, I thought Treasure Island was the best book ever written. Later, I thought The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe was brilliant. In high school my answer would have been Huckleberry Finn (and it still might be), and in college it was Crime and Punishment.  I'm a huge Dickens fan, and I think Joseph Conrad may be the best novelist in history. Brennan Manning's Ragamuffin Gospel changed my life. But if I had to pick just one book as a favorite, I think it would have to be Tom Pynchon's Gravity's Rainbow. Brilliant from first page to last.

3. If you were an author, why would you want Chip MacGregor to be your agent?

Well… I am an author. So I guess I'd say (assuming I'm speaking as an outsider) that Chip knows what he's doing — knows what it's like to make a living as a writer. He has a long track record of having done deals and successfully serving his clients. He reads widely, he's confident, and he'll tell me the truth instead of BS'ing me. He's focused on making me better. He thinks long term. He knows what to do next and stays calm in a crisis. He returns my calls, and he gets along with most people. (Good grief. This man is a saint! Call the pope, quick.)

4. So what are Chip's weaknesses?

Too many to count. I can be a pain. I get so focused that I get cranky when interrupted or when things don't go my way. I am always thinking "make it better," so I sometimes forget to say "nice work." I talk too softly. I make inappropriate jokes. I suffer fools badly. I lack faith. I have a very hard time forgiving myself for my failings. Let's move on.

5. Okay, if you could be the agent for any author from the past, who would it have been?

That one's easy: Mark Twain. A brilliant stylist, with a wonderful wit and a natural writing voice. The man could create great prose while (as we say in the Northwest) half drunk and falling off a log. And if there's one thing I've always appreciated, it's talent. Twain had a double portion. He was funny — naturally funny, and I also appreciate people who make me laugh. I'd take Mark Twain over anyone else.

6. And what was the worst story you were ever pitched?

Man…  I could go for hours. I once had a guy tell me that he and his son were "the two witnesses of Revelation," and inform me that I needed to send him "a large advance" or he would tell God to hit my part of the country with "severe weather patterns." I rejected it — and survived the drought and locust plague.

I once had a guy send me a book about how to play poker naked (complete with photo). He was middle-aged, and had a pot belly. It wasn't pretty.

There was this one guy who kept sending me his book entitled, "Harry Potter Visits Veda-Land," in which the lovable wizard apparently becomes a Hindu and has merry mixups in India. (I'm sure Ms Rowling would approve.)

I've had proposals in pencil, proposals from people who were incarcerated, and proposals from people who do not speak English. I had one woman tell me she communicates with plants, and wanted to do a book where she related their stories. I frequently get emails from people saying something like, "I hear you do some religious-type books, so I know you'll like this one. I have visions. I can see the future." Unfortunately, they can never see far enough in the future to know that I'm going to reject them.

I used to go to this one particular writing conference where every year this woman would try to pitch me her book: "My Father Was The Hamburglar." You'll never guess what it was about: Her father played the Hamburglar on those old McDonalds TV commercials. Scintillating.

At another conference, this sleazy Sonny Bono-like character kept trying to sell me a book that had the title (and I swear I'm not making this up) How to Make Out with Chicks. He reminded me of Dean Martin playing Matt Helm in those godawful movies from the late 60's.

Oh, and worst: I once had a guy try and hand me his proposal while I was standing at the urinal. I am not exaggerating. I wanted to turn and say thanks at that very moment.

But my favorite proposal was probably from the guy who used translation software and failed to edit it. If you're unaware, translation software inserts alternative words in brackets after the word in question. So his first line was:

        "Dear Chip [potato, chocolate, buffalo, fish and__],

Thanks [gratitude, appreciation] for looking at my book [tome, treatise, verbiage]…"

7. When you wake up in the morning, what's the first thing that comes to mind?

It's probably, "What am I going to do today?" I'm  a very organized person, so I start off by thinking about the day's events: Who am I seeing? What needs to get done? What is important? But soon after that comes, "How are my girls?" and "I need some coffee." (My girls, in case you don't know, are both studying in Europe. Molly is a grad student in Sweden, studying third-world development. Kate is a sophomore in Spain, studying…whatever it is they study in Spain. Flamenco, maybe.)

8. What's the last book that brought you to tears?

Susan Meissner's The Shape of Mercy. A fabulous read. And yes, I represented it, so you might consider this a biased response, but it's honestly one of the best novels I've read in the past five years. Just a fabulous book.

9. What is your favorite book of the Bible?

1 John. There's an emphasis on truth and love and living out your faith. Three things I'd like to be better at. Saint John wants us to understand that Christ was real, and that the Spirit is shaping our lives as we seek to live out our faith… but at the same time, he notes that we all fail, and need forgiveness, and need to grow. It's a great book for those of us who have been failures, and need to be reminded to press on, and love people, and demonstrate that we can be different, better people. I believe my faith is supposed to shape the way I do my job, the way I represent authors, the way I live my life. Again — I'd like to be better at all of that.

10. Last, what do you love most about life?

Lots. The fact that my wife still loves me. The fact that I have three children of whom I am incredibly proud. The fact that God loves me (in fact, He sought me out, even though I'm a wreck). The fact that I have good friends, who understand the importance of things like great writing, and baseball, the Oregon Ducks, and the Green Bay Packers. And words — God, how I love words. Knowing that I'm going to open up a book and read great thoughts inspires me every single day. No kidding. I love doing what I do. I love the authors I get to represent. I love the books I get to read. I love this stuff.

There you go. Sorry if this sounds self-aggrandizing, but I thought it would be different from the usual stuff.

Some good and bad news in the business of publishing…

1. Bad News: The financials for publishing look awful. I'm not an alarmist, because I happen to think the people racing out of the stock market are simply skittish, and that's made stock prices of publicly-traded companies artificially low, but we're seeing real problems with publishers and retailers. Harper-Collins announced that their sales were off 4.5% from last year (and, um, last year at this time they were 10% down from the previous year). Simon & Schuster and Hachette are also down. In fact, a report on the top 17 publishers of hardcover adult books reports that sales in September were down 30% (sales of trade paperbacks and mass markets were down 8%). Many publishers are announcing that they're trimming their lists. Some are cutting jobs (Rodale announced they were axing 10% of their work force). The chairman of Barnes & Noble flatly said he is expecting "a terrible holiday." Ouch.

2. Good News: On the up side of the business, there are numerous areas of growth. Children's titles are on an upswing. YA fiction is selling well. Harlquin is actually growing in a shrinking economy. And publishers are still in the business of creating and selling books, so they still need to buy books from authors. Things might be moving more slowly right now, but eventually publishers will remember that they need new books, and acquisitions will pick up. I see publishers working smarter and leaner — which is not a bad thing.

3. Bad News: There is a passing of the torch in publishing these days. Three excellent writers have passed from our midst. First, the wonderful mystery writer Tony Hillerman passed away — the man who created Navajo policemen Joe Leaphorn and Jim Chee, and brought us all great cultural details about Native Americans in his books. Second, non-fiction writer Studs Terkel died last week. His book Hard Time remains one of the two best books ever written on the Great Depression, and The Good War is an eye-opening depiction of WWII. Third, sci-fi and techno writer Michael Crichton succumbed to cancer. One of the most influential popular novelists, he had a brilliant mind for creating storylines. The world of literature has lost a lot of talent in a week.

4. Good News: In a decision author representatives called "breathtaking," the Authors Guild settled their suit with Google. After three years of fighting, the two sides have finally come to agreement so that authors can get a fair share of revenues from books that are made part of Google's search engine. AND they did this by negotiating, instead of having some judge have to settle it for them (and thus make both sides happy, and lead to more legal wrangling, etc).

5. Bad News: The Orphan Works Bill is going to be presented to the next congress. Reiterating something I said in an earlier post, this is nothing more than giving lazy writers a license to steal. The short version: the government believes there have been too many lawsuites over material that has been lifted from websites. So this bill would allow another person to come along and "recast, transform, adapt, or integrate" your material, then sell it and keep all the profits. (Put another way: You could steal my answers to these types of questions, reword them a bit, and claim it as your own…with government protection.) On top of that, the bill suggests research will be handed over to the Copyright Office, AND any damages for someone stealing your work will be limited to whatever a judge thinks you could have reasonably sold your words for. A truly terrible change to our copyright laws for an writer who thinks for himself or herself.

6. Good News: Thomas Nelson is starting a new program that will provide free review copies of select titles to bloggers who agree to post 200 words and link to Amazon.com. In other words, they're going to take the informal system set up by CBA author groups, and formalize it. I think this is a brilliant move, and could really boost a book's online marketing. They're calling it the "Book Review Bloggers" program.

7. Bad News: Some significant changes at CBA houses. Joey Paul, the longtime editor at Thomas Nelson, is leaving to take another job elsewhere in the industry. There's a shakeup happening at Multnomah (now owned by Random House). Lots of rumors of staff trimming at other houses. In a bad economy, real people get hurt. Keep them in your prayers.

8. Good News: Lisa Samson's novel, Embrace Me, was just named by Library Journal as one of the Best Books of the Year. More Good News: My Oregon Ducks are 7 and 3. And even MORE Good News: It's almost Thanksgiving.